March 31st, 2009


I don't like big Buts.

On friday, the receptionist for the cancer specialist rang and said they'd had some cancellations, and would I like to move my appointment forward from 6th May to 31st March? I said Yes, and so I was at the specialist at 9am this morning.

He looked at the mammograms and ultrasounds, and said there is nothing to worry about. But...

The "But" is that there is something there. My left manboob has a benign fibrous adenoma. My right manboob has some distended ducts -- ducts that are found in everyon's chest -- that are filling with fluid until the pressure grows and they leak. Hence, leaky manboob.

The fluid is not a discharge from infection, which would be bad, and it's not blood, which would be really bad and would indicate cancer. The fluid is more like blood plasma, watery, straw-coloured runny stuff. Which is only marginally more worrying than milk -- strange, odd, wierd, but not dangerous or an indication of anything bad. An inconvenience more than anything.

The doctor and I talked it over and the increased risks I have -- ie manboobs that have lumps and ducts, plus my grandmother died of breast cancer -- and I am now booked in for a bilateral gynacomectomy, aka subcutaneous masectomy, some time in the next 6 months. It will be a day surgery followed by a week off work. Subcutaneous masectomy is the least-severe type of masectomy. They cut the breast open around the nipples, scoop out all the breast tissue and fat, and sew it together. No packing or skin grafts required. Instead of manboobs I'll have mancraters until fat starts filling in the holes. And I'll still have bloke nipples.
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