January 24th, 2002


Stolen from Scientific American

-In Einstein's famous equation E = mc2, the mc stands for the introduction of his guests for the evening.
-A watt is often the beginning of an interrogative sentence. Joules are what a nice sword is encrusted with. An erg is a desire.
-A cotyledon was a late Triassic dinosaur with a brain the size of a seed.
-3.14159 is a large piece of pi.
-In computer language, binary code means that you owe one.
-Greenwich mean time refers to four in the morning, when the bars close in New York City's West Village.
-In electromagnetic energy, wavelength is defined as the speed of light divided by the frequency, Kenneth.
-Entomology is the other one; you're thinking of etymology.
-A Fourier transform is a mathematical manipulation by which a chinchilla turns into a coat.
-The Bernoulli principle describes a flow of air that forces Mrs. Bernoulli to sleep in the guest bedroom.
-Prime numbers are whatever Alan Greenspan says they are.
-Continental drift is when your limo wanders into oncoming traffic.
-The Nobel Prize is an award given for the year's best door knocker.
-The sine is the guy who gets a loan. The cosine is the guy who pays off the loan. The tangent is the guy in Rio who actually spends the money.
-Parthenogenesis is the creation of Greek architecture.
-Anthropology is when your uncle has to say he's sorry to his wife. (This actually happens in some places.)
-The hypotenuse is a type of syringe that holds 10 shots.
-A ramjet is anyone who played football for the Rams and the Jets. The most famous ramjet is Joe Namath, who was an expert in field theory.
-The force F with which you can pound something is equivalent to m, which stands for mallet, times a, which stands for the body part into which you should pound it.
-The phalanges is a mighty river. The metatarsals are pouch-bearing mammals. And the humerus is working as hard as he can.

...I still miss James Burke.
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